Because we must approach contemplative prayer with no expectations, we should resist the temptation to “assess” our prayer time and the quality of growth in our relationships with God. It is quite human to want to live up to a certain standard in prayer, and so we set goals for our prayer time – a certain number of minutes spent in prayer, perhaps, or a prayer period with no distractions – as well as for our progress along the spiritual path – we tell ourselves, “I won’t respond when someone pushes my ‘hot button,’” or we suppress or dismiss desires for affirmation and consolation as no longer appropriate. But the desire to follow our own map to fullness in Christ, or to set any sort of self-made timetable or procedural guide for communion, is to fundamentally misunderstand growth in Divine Relationship. Remember that, in all circumstances, God is the Source and initiator of our yearning, Christ alone knows the way and indeed is the Way we should go, and we are to move along this path in the Spirit’s time and as the Spirit leads. We are encouraged to observe who and how we are now, particularly in relationship to who and how we used to be. However, we should never push to be more developed, more perfected, farther along in the spiritual journey than we find ourselves at present. We only need to stay open and available, and let God lead the way!